I'd be back.

... good thing I never did cuz otherwise you'd have missed me.

You know that time you decided to go to your cousin’s wedding in Minnesota and drunkenly agreed to carpool with her best friend? Who* you’ve never met but didn’t seem so bad with 3 cocktails and 4 shots of whiskey in both your bellies?  And then as soon as you get in the car and you get through the 5 minutes of laughs, you realize you’ve run out of things to say?

That’s what we’re going with. I decided that listening to ‘Click and Clack’ and figuring out what’s causing that annoying clinking in Betty Sue’s 2007 Nissan was a better option than forced, unwitty banter.

And, while , that’s partially true.  It’s mostly not.  

 If I were being self deprecating, I’d say I’m lazy and I throw myself too heavily into little projects and then grow bored when they don’t show immediate results.

But now, I’m turning down NPR** and talking your ear off.  Because, quite frankly, things are different.

       a)      I’m, again, one of those fools that is buying into the schpeel that gluten’s bad for you – and that high fructose corn syrup, dairy, other grains and beans ain’t so great either.  Right now, I’m gnawing on a fatty salad of steak, cabbage, toasted almonds, caramelized onions, avocado, a slew of veggies and some random dressing I whipped up.  Beware, I’m definitely going to try to convince you that my cauliflower mashed potatoes taste like the real thing. 

 

       b)      I’m a future bride. And if you’ve ever been around me when event planning opportunities arise, you’ll know this is pretty much on my brain non-stop.  ‘Oh, but it’s a year away,’ you say, smugly.  “OH!” I respond, “Somehow a slab of undercooked steak ended up on you face.”***.  E*f you – I’m going to start thinking about centerpieces and guests lists with or without your support.  And since the tall dude is actively seeking a role as, ‘tell me what we’re doing, don’t make me guess what you’re thinking’ groom, I’m sure wedding talk will abound.

      c)       I’m newly a student.  Some folks like to pretend that being in school makes you busier.  If history holds any truth in my tenaciousness as a student – the closer a final looms, the more likely I’ll be looking for late night movies, impromptu games of Pictionary and new blog entries to write.

You know the office episode where they talk about the perfect storm?  Or the actual movie, that I’ve never seen?  Well, this is it.  Let’s talk about my life.